Anyone who has been the victim of NPD abuse needs to educate themselves comprehensively as to what it is, and what they were subjected to. This then will give them the diagnosis required. Only then can they start to plan and execute their recovery and healing.
The purpose of this research is to Self-Validate. Given that you will never be given closure, and the narcissist will neither submit to a formal diagnosis not be accountable for the chaos and devastation they wreaked on your life, you will need to validate the experience yourself. Why is this so important? Because it gives you a different framework to manage you own healing with. It proves that this is a situation way more complex and damaging than “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”. It tells you that you need to learn how to cope with and heal from C-PTSD. That you mustn’t go to a normal therapist but one who specializes in NPD. That the best support group are not your friends, but other NPD victims. That the research you need to do, and the books that you should buy, are all about NPD.
And in specific contexts:
- If you are married, you need to brace yourself and plan for a high conflict divorce like few others.
- If you have kids together, you need to anticipate Parental Alienation and the huge impact that this will have on your life and theirs.
- If you area Child of a Narcopath, you need to understand how the situation is going to have affect not just you but your whole family. And you need to understand how your role might well rotate through those that Narcs often give their kids. You need to understand how to heal childhood wounds so that you don’t carry them throughout your adult existence.
- If you are a Work Colleague, you need to understand how this may well all end up affecting your career to a much greater extent than you fear.
You will need to understand what a smear campaign is all about, how it is already underway, and what you should expect from “friends”.
If you are a car that is broken, the guide required to help fix the problem is a workshop manual. The one with NPD on the front cover is the one you need to use.